““This sucks.” Came the twitter reply on my screen from Ally. I smiled sadly to myself, knowing only too well what she was talking about. The nausea had subsided for me leaving only the dull ache in my heart and the pit of my stomach to remind me that I was not ok. I liked to pretend I was, but few people could see behind the masked pain in my eyes. Heartache aside, I couldn’t keep putting myself through all the ridiculousness that had become so familiar to me. I had cried my last tear over him and he was NOT going to get anymore out of me. I was done. DONE.
My heart was breaking for Ally all the same as the notifications chimed in.
“It’s killing me. I wish I didn’t feel anything.”
“He was my best friend.”
“I did everything I could.”
“Still wasn’t good enough.”
It was like the ghost of my sixteen year old self coming back to life through my laptop screen. I felt for her, I really did. I was going through my own heartbreak but this time was different. This time I was older and this time, I was colder.
“He still cares about me.” Ally was half pleading, I think more for the benefit of herself than anyone else. “He just doesn’t want to be with me.”
Another knife jabbed into my heart. I knew those words, I knew that desperation, I just wasn’t that naive anymore. I was passed lying to myself. I was through with all those games. It was in that moment that I realized I really had grown up.
“Just let it go.” I couldn’t believe how cold I was sounding. So unlike the former me who would have cooed and sympathized. “Walk away and don’t look back. It’s time to just let it go.”
“I just can’t let go.”
Oh honey, don’t I know that feeling all too well. I tried with everything in me to hold onto something that wasn’t even there. It was like trying to catch the sunlight and keep it in the palm of your hand. Love is not tangible; you can’t physically hold it, touch it, restrain it – it courses through you like a river but not every stream reaches an ocean. I had taken the wrong bend somewhere along the lines and ended up in a swamp and now I was just drowning in the mess. Typical.” – “My Life in Shambles” [Working Title] – Me, of course!
I was fresh out of makeup school and had by secured a seasonal part time job at Sephora. I was through the roof excited! Sephora is a makeup heaven! I was so nervous at orientation. I was surrounded by all these gorgeous girls with their perfect hair and flawless complexions, how the hell was I going to fit in? Everyone has a bitch face when in full makeup so I really couldn’t get a good sense of the other new girls in my group, were they just being stand-offish because of nerves too? That’s when I met Ally. Cute, adorable, sweet little Ally.
We hit it off really well from the very start. Everyone thought we were sisters, the two giggling little Filipinas. She was my best friend at work. We closely followed each other lives, the ups and the downs. We both got hired on as permanent staff after the holidays so our friendship flourished. I looked forward to that sweet smile, and girlish giggle every day. All of us Sephora girls were envious of her natural beauty and charisma, her flawless fashion sense and that special something about her that was just so pure, so genuine. There’s no way in hell I could ever pull off her level of cuteness or just blink and be THAT adorable. I wanted to be like her so much.
We leaned on each other when the times got rough. We both drove around in Angelica’s car that day she called in tears. She was the one who made a fuss about my birthday at work and made sure they bought me a cake and a card. She was the one who jumped for joy when I told her I was taking her to the Nick Carter concert because she’s the one who would appreciate that little childhood dream.
My heart has broken for Ally numerous times. When she got attacked going home from my birthday one year, my boy and my friends were ready to pile into the car to go get her to protect her. She’s the kind of person you always want to protect because you never, ever want her to lose that sweetness, that pureness. Ally has no idea just how jawdroppingly beautiful she actually is and that’s only one of the reasons that makes her so loveable and adorable.
Sergio M, Love, Poetry Corsets, Art by Sarah Ebisuzaki
When he broke her heart, I was shattered for her. She couldn’t stop crying. A year later, he was still stringing her along, still calling her and running off to the woman he was actually in love with. We got our hearts broken at the same time but I would have given anything for it to have been just me.
Ally was actually the first person I had in mind when I started created unicorns based off of people. I chose the Pokemon fabric to capture her little geeky ways, the childlike wonder, her love of nerdiness. Primary colours to showcase how basically genuine she is. The glitter to show off how she really does sparkle when she enters a room. The more anime styled eyes for her love of everything anime and the way she looks and dresses so perfectly you would think she was an anime character come to life. Obviously there’s the curly flash lashes she is never without. Soft flannel pyjama fabric for our girly sleepovers and for the fact that you just want to squeeze her every time you see her.
This is a soft sculpture portrait of one of my best friends, not just a cuddle toy to give you a hug when your own heart is broken. She will pick you up with kind concern when you’re down and ALWAYS lends a sympathetic ear. There’s only a few times in your life when you will meet someone who truly has a heart of gold, kind people there are many, pure, they are as rare as unicorns. Ally will kill you with kindness and pierce your heart with wide eyed adorableness.
Birthday: March 24
Species: Misfit Unicorn
Size: 13” x 8”
Materials: Fake Fur, Plastic, False Lashes
Eyes: Hand sculpted, molded and cast in plastic
Available for Adoption: COMING SOON